Wednesday, May 22, 2013

i'm just so sick.

sick of working way too much overtime.
sick of not spending quality time with Miles.
sick of not having alone time with Brett.
sick of these disgusting cockroaches that are still invading my house even after we paid a crap ton of money and moved all of our furniture for them to spray.
sick of my car overheating and having to crank the hot air while roasting to death in 90+ degree weather on my drive home.
sick of having car problems at the worst possible times.
sick of our property managment company not fixing problems in our rental house for MONTHS.
sick of everything in our house breaking down.
sick of wasting money on food that goes bad.
sick of trying to find an internet provider that doesn't raise their rates to a ridiculous amount after their short promotions.
sick of having to spend hours on the phone with a health insurance company to get back the $1600 they were supposed to return to us over a year ago.
sick of being fat and out of shape.
sick of never wanting to go to the gym anymore, just after I signed a new one year contract.
sick of not being able to just lay down and veg to t.v. after a long day at work.
sick of spending an hour of my day commuting.
sick of not knowing what I believe about my religion anymore.
sick of people talking smack about my sister.
sick of staring at all of these boxes that are still left unpacked.
sick of the fact that we've lived here for almost four months and have yet to go to Zion.
sick of never being up-to-date with my credit card statements and bills.
sick of not having time to write letters to my loved ones on missions.
sick of not having time to call and talk to the people I care about.
sick of stressing about finding our ideal dream home.
sick of worrying about whether or not we will qualify for a mortgage.
sick of working an 8-5 job, thus never being able to call or go to places to get anything done because those are also the only hours they are open.
sick of putting off going to the dentist.
sick of guilt and pressure to get Miles immunized and the stress of arranging multiple appointments.
sick of never having a weekend to myself where I have nothing at all that needs to be done or worried about.
sick of not being in school and knowing exactly what's expected of me.
sick of not having all the answers to help all of my clients.
sick of the lack of time I have at work to get everything done.
sick of the price of gas and how it constantly goes up.
sick of feeling helpless when Miles is sick or hurt.
sick of waiting for my t.v. shows to come back for a new season.
sick of wasting my time being promised money, but then being lied to and cheated.
sick of not having time to scrapbook all Miles's pictures.
sick of our toilets always being clogged.
sick of never being satisfied by the snacks in my house.
sick of my daily run to the gas station to fuel my Dr. Pepper addiction.
sick of the lack of jeans I have that fit me.
sick of not having the strength/time/willpower to wean Miles.
sick of the pressure/guilt that I haven't already done that.
sick of not being able to wear tanks tops in zillion degree weather.
sick of not having any time to read anymore.
sick of never seeing my family.
sick of worrying about my little brother.
sick of companies claiming I ordered things and charging my credit card without my permission and having to go through the hassle of mailing things back only to NOT get a refund.
sick of not having extra money to spend on things I need.
sick of spending way too much money on fast food.
sick of feeling like I went into the wrong profession.
sick of being too busy for yoga.
sick of Miles not sleeping through the night when we go out of town.
sick of feeling completely inadequate every time I lead a group at work.
sick of my torturous gallstones.
sick of stressing about having to have surgery on them at some point.
sick of thinking about the disgusting cleanse that I really need to try to flush them out.
sick of having to clean up after my sloppy self.
sick of the hard water stains on all the faucets in my house.
sick of the summer heat already being here.
sick of having a bleak, empty office because I don't have time or money to buy a couch and decorations.
sick of being so busy and overwhelmed I can't even answer a simple text message.

basically, I'm just sick.