Perfection

Isn't this picture just amazingly beautiful?? It was the background on a school computer I was using the other day, and I have become obsessed by how serene it makes me feel. When I look at this picture, I feel calm and content, which to me is a pretty foreign feeling. In fact, this last month, I don't know if I can even think of one moment when I felt calm. Life just happens too fast, you know?

I started graduate school last month which has been amazing. It has also been hell. Being in the program has already stretched me and challenged me in ways I can't even describe. I love that I get to spend my educational time studying topics that I am interested in, but I sure don't love that on Mondays I spend 9 hours in a dungeon-like classroom. I also don't love that I must wake up by 6:30 a.m. at least three days a week... There is nothing that drives me further towards insanity! But somehow, I am still alive, and when I take a step back, I know that this is going to be one of the those experiences that I will look back on and laugh about, and appreciate the person it has made me become.

It's amazing how much writing can do for a person. I haven't sat down and written like this in over a month, and I sure am feeling it. In a few classes we are discussing the importance of self-awareness and knowing what coping mechanisms you use. I used to write all the time as a teenager, when I was going through some of the most intense and awful experiences of my life. Somehow, when I got to college, I forgot how much I needed that. I think I just got too busy with the writing required for other classes, and I was constantly working (I'm not one of the rich kids who gets everything handed to them on a platter), so writing for fun, for NEED just got placed on the back burner. I am so glad that I rediscovered this "coping skill" of mine, and even though I haven't had the time to write in over a month, I know that it is one thing I will be doing just as often as I can.

I must keep this post short and mostly un-insightful for tonight; We are going out of town for the weekend and I have a to-do list a mile long that needs to be consulted before the morning comes...(Go figure!) But I really wanted to share a link to a blog post I heard about through a friend via Facebook. I took the time to read it the other night, and I'm really glad I did. The timing of the post was quite ironic, as I have been arduously confronting my own issues with perfection over the last few months. But that is a story for another night. Be sure to check out the link!